Breathing

Over the weekend, I went to a breathing workshop.

When I told the people close to me that I was doing the course, the reactions I got were mixed. And I completely understand why. Why would anyone need to learn how to breathe? It's automatic, something we do naturally, without thinking about it.

And that's exactly what I thought too.

It took a room full of people and a yoga mat to finally get me there.

I should also say that this wasn't my first introduction to breathing. I've read a few books over the years; Breath by James Nestor, The Wim Hof Method and What Doesn't Kill Us by Scott Carney, which looks at cold exposure and breath control. So I was already familiar with the idea that breathing can influence performance and resilience. And yet, knowing all of that still wasn't enough to make me do anything about it.

This weekend felt different. It wasn't about techniques or pushing limits, it was about understanding what's happening in the body in a quiet way, and that changed everything.

What I'm starting to realise is this: breathing is automatic but how you breathe shapes how your body feels, moves and responds, and that's something you can influence.

What surprised me most is that breathing isn't just about getting air in and out. It affects the body from the inside, in a much more subtle and interconnected way than I expected.

One moment that really clicked for me was a simple chair pose exercise. The teacher had us hold the pose twice: once with a slow, grounding exhale, and once with a strong energising exhale. The difference was striking. With the slow exhale, my body felt steadier and stronger. With the strong energising exhale, the pose felt more energetic, but my shoulders tensed up, my neck tightened, and it required much more effort and control to hold.

When your breathing is calm and efficient, your body tends to organise itself better. Your ribcage moves freely, your neck and shoulders soften, and movement feels smoother without forcing it. On the other hand, when breathing becomes shallow or tense, which happens more often than we realise, the body follows that pattern. The shoulders creep up, the neck tightens, and everything starts to feel more restricted.

And then there's the way breathing affects how we feel.

When we're stressed, our breathing tends to become faster, shorter, almost a bit chaotic. When we're calm, it naturally slows. This is because your breath is closely linked to your nervous system, the part that determines whether you feel alert and tense or safe and relaxed.

The interesting part is that this relationship goes both ways.

Here’s a clear look at how breathing and your nervous system work together

Just as your state affects your breathing, your breathing can influence your state. Sometimes, simply slowing your breath or softening your breath a little creates a quiet but noticeable shift.

Better breathing isn’t about taking bigger breaths. It’s actually about doing less, but doing it more efficiently. Slower, lighter breathing allows the body to function in a more balanced way. It feels counterintuitive at first, especially when we’re used to hearing “take a deep breath,” but often what the body needs isn’t more air, just a more relaxed rhythm.

I also realised over the weekend that over-breathing is just as real as “air hunger.” The first shows up subtly (like repeated yawning), while the second feels more obvious (sighing or gasping). In both cases, it’s often not about a lack of oxygen, but about how the body is trying to regulate itself.

I’ve also noticed how breathing brings my attention back to the present. The moment I start paying attention to my breath, I become more aware of my body, where I’m holding tension, whether I’m rushing, or if I’m actually present. It’s not about overthinking it, but about reconnecting.

Interestingly, it doesn’t always mean turning attention inward. Sometimes when things feel overwhelming, focusing too much internally can feel heavy. In those moments, it helps to shift attention outward, to feel your feet on the ground and notice the space around you.

One simple way to explore this is: As you breathe in, notice the space around you: the room, the air, the quiet details. As you breathe out, imagine your breath softening into that space. No pushing, no forcing. Just allowing your awareness to gently widen.

Nothing dramatic happens, but something subtle changes. The body softens, the mind quietens, and you stop holding yourself so tightly.

I think that's the part I'm beginning to understand more deeply.

Breathing isn’t something you need to fix or control all the time. It’s more like a quiet tool you can use to gently influence how your body and mind respond. Sometimes you turn inward to reconnect. Sometimes you expand outward to create space.

It’s less about doing it “right,” and more about noticing what you need. And maybe that’s the simplest place to start: Just notice how you’re breathing right now, without changing anything. Then, if it feels right, let it soften just a little.

Because breathing might be automatic, but it’s far from insignificant.

It quietly shapes how we experience everything.